Dad Admits He ‘Cannot Stand’ His 5-Year-Old Daughter, Hates Being a Parent
Being a parent is tough for some people. Most parents hide their true feelings when it comes to their daily struggles of raising a kid.
One dad took to Reddit explaining he has reached his wits' end with his daughter, admitting he hates being around her.
In a post titled, "I cannot stand my child and I hate being a parent," the anonymous man noted his daughter is about to turn 5 — and he loathes her.
"Unplanned child. Supportive families," he wrote via Reddit. "Financially stable. Homeowners. Healthy relationship. Since had a vasectomy."
The 31-year-old dad explained he knew from the moment his daughter was born he wasn't cut out to be adad, adding he's tried to enjoy being a parent, but he just isn't able to.
He wrote his daughter has a "good life," but just "refuses" to listen to what he and her mother says.
"She is horrible to the both of us for no reason. Genuinely horrible," he wrote. "I can tell my partner doesn't like being a parent either, she hasn't directly said that but I know. I've told her I hate it, everything about it. Less freedom, less money, less social time with others and as a couple."
He noted the "stress" of being a parent is "unreal" and "relentless," getting to the point where he can't "stand to be around her."
"Her voice will stress me out, the constant moaning, whining, needing, crying and sass," he continued. "If it was my choice I'd never see her again. Harsh I know, possibly unforgivable. I would never leave or put her into care, I know how unfair that is, she isn't doing this on purpose, she doesn't know the pain she causes."
He continued: "But honestly, I hate being a parent. I'd do anything to have my old life back, the one where we had freedom, [were] happy and enjoyed waking up each morning and always looking forward to the next day."
The man explained he and his partner have support from their parents who will also sometimes watch their daughter for them, "but it's never enough."
While he understands that most children act out at his daughter's age, and he does sympathize with parents who have it "a lot harder," he's completely miserable.
The frustrated dad noted he has shared his feelings with both his parents. He also tries to remain "positive," but knows the situation won't change.
"I don't think I will ever enjoy being a parent, maybe when she grows into a nicer individual and starts to understand life more. A part of me knows it will get better. But I hate this. I absolutely hate how I feel about life," he detailed. "Also, I don't need professional help, I'm not suicidal. I'm just deeply unhappy with being a parent, it isn't fun for me. I know there will be a day it turns around but a happy future doesn't change a present me."
Reddit users flooded the comment section urging the dad to seek professional help so his daughter doesn't begin to feel his resentment.
"You know you can still get professional help even if you're not suicidal right? I do think you should make it an option," one person wrote.
Another commented: "You can't fake it 24/7, even if you think you are, and kids are ALWAYS watching and absorbing: it's their jobs. If you won't do it for you, do it for her, and the subtle ways your hatred of being responsible for her may be seeping out in ways you don't even realize. Good luck man, this is rough."
Others shared they grew up with parents who resented them and revealed how that affected their life.
"I have a mom like this and from a very young age I could feel her feelings of resentment and it led me to being very emotionally immature for a long time because I did not understand emotions at all. please get some therapy, because trust me, your daughter knows you’re only tolerating her," someone offered.
Meanwhile, another user gave this advice: "I grew up with a mother who didn't like me and I felt it. I tried most of my life to get her approval, and nothing worked. It wasn't until the last few years, in my twenties, that I stopped trying and had grown a lot emotionally. Kids can tell when you don't like them, even if you're trying to hide it and still trying to show them 'love,' they can sense something is off and will react as a child will."