It’s Hot As Balls: A Truly Southern Poem About This Heat

If you haven't seen the forecast, the next seven days are going to be brutal. It's not good enough that we're experiencing some of the hottest weather we've have in a few years, Mother Nature has to call in some true pipe-hitting temps to really just let us know how insignificant we humans are. 105 isn't good enough for one day... Lets just layer those on, plus the heat index on top of that!

There is one good thing that comes out of these extreme temperatures though... I don't have to mow the lawn, because that grass isn't growing. Don't get me wrong, I love mowing my lawn. It's one of my simple stress-relieving pleasures in life... But when it's 100+ degrees, it's miserable and I don't want to be miserable.

"But weeds love this heat!"

True story. Weeds will grow in just about every condition. Rainy, dry, hot, cold... Weeds don't care. Luckily, I spend every Spring ridding my yard of weeds. That way, when the heat hits, I just stay inside and drink my lemonade. I know before too long, the temps will be back in the upper 80's and low 90's, the grass will pop out of dormancy, and I'll be mowing in the heat along with you until Thanksgiving.