You Can Have One Of My Million Dollar Ideas

Some people have told me over the years that I have a weird thought process in the way my mind works, and they're not wrong. My brain hops around subjects a lot like action sports athletes perform parkour. I don't think it's weird, but to each their own. At least it's entertaining.

This morning I was sitting in my favorite chair getting ready to start the day pretty much like any other person in this country. A quick check of social media, see what's new on the forum, and getting a head start on the daily email chain that breaks out here at the studios. KLAW's Jeri Anderson is planning a waffle breakfast day tomorrow morning, so it's an endless ring of who will bring what... Someone mentioned orange juice and champagne for mimosas... It was at that moment, I had one of those million dollar ideas.

You know how the never-ending beat-down of "toxic masculinity" has lead the toughest men down a path to enjoying hard cider and sparkling hard seltzers in recent years? What if we bottled screwdrivers and mimosas that could be bought at any gas station in America? If some dude is willing to sip down mango seltzer and hard lemonade, why wouldn't they eat up a bottle of orange juice with a shot of vodka in it? Admittedly, the mimosas would most likely need to be canned to contain all that bubbly, but it could be done. All we'd need is a cool design and a catchy name like "Killer O.J." and I'm pretty sure it would fly off the shelves quicker than skinny jeans and tight t-shirts at a bro-country concert.

Before you say it, yes, I know there are already products like this on the market... but nobody cares who's first, they only care who's better. Oreo wasn't the original and I couldn't even fathom a scoop of cookies-n-cream without em. It's all about better marketing. If you have the means to run with this idea, by all means do so. It's my gift to you... but when the profits start coming in, don't forget about my little ten percent.